Hopes filled with doubts! 

The decisions she once made, were now blurry. 
The people she waved goodbye, were now being missed. 
Was she ever wrong in choosing her self first or was it all about how the time played its game? 
Sitting in dark, she still wonders were they worth the effort. 
A little buzz on her phone reverts, baby nobody’s worthier than you and nobody would ever be. 
Alas, she fell asleep with her thoughts still mingling and heart still hoping. 

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Some Nights Like These! 

On Nights like these, when loneliness knocks and emptiness whispers. 
I remember each of you who once said they love me

I remember each of you who decided to forever be here with me 

I remember each of you whom I once called mine
Where are you now? Where have you been? 

Do you miss me as much as I miss you or you found someone of your own! 

Do you blame me for not letting you in anymore? 

Do you not remember me anymore? 

Do you care for me ? Do you love me? 

Some Nights likes these when you realise its still not begun. 

An idle mind is a devil’s workshop 

2 years ago, after the roller coaster of career choices and gaining exposure;I just gave in! 

I used to adapt to any thing and used to start doing things in the best way possible! I used to take them as challenges but honestly ,how far would I get with that?! 

 

Almost 2 years ago, when I gave in and my female instincts and tantrums started playing with me (well hormones!) I stopped functioning!
I had a great “excuse” (which was then the world end for me) -my family issues! 

I was born over sensitive and hyper emotional; honestly even these adjectives are an understatement! (My best friend is going to have a crazy smile over this line!) 
And I didn’t really got out of it! Instead I got another excuse in my life… It was so worthless that even mentioning it is our waste of time! 
And that time when my best friend stood by me ;I acted deaf! ( I love you) 
But out of everything that we spoke of I think the biggest lesson learnt was:-

“An idle mind is a devil’s workshop!”


Seriously!!!!!!! Soon when things started hitting me hard and I got my old ‘I can do anything’ self back I started a bullshit ending spree!! Literally!!😂(It was fun,surprisingly)
I ended my stupid friendships,worthless conversations and over thinking.
I started working and I got so so busy that even when my heart popped out things, I was like dude I don’t have time for this!
My world became smaller and smaller but my mind became peaceful!
And when I met my best friend recently, she says, You know what ? You have changed? 

And I felt nothing but pride !!!! She also told me: “I told you ,when you will get busy you will eventually not care!”
She was right folks, so was my Big Brother!! 
When you keep your mind free, your heart takes the charge and it makes you do the crazy dumb thinking and trust me it is not healthy!!!! You spend years thinking and feeling in a way but when you grow up, when you become mature and enter the new phase those years’ old ideologies fail !! 

They are a waste!! 
So , honestly even if it’s a day and you got nothing just do something!

Go out, clean your room,read a book, start a new course or create something beautiful!

Because later in life,you won’t have these moments ! You won’t really have time to spare ! 

So just go out there and invest your time into some “thing” ( NOT PEOPLE )

You will thank yourself later
Don’t give your mind a break ; don’t let your heart take over.

Be busy, be beautiful and be YOU!! 
P.S Also we humans are weird and if once we get used to lazying and wasting time it’s difficult to get your butt up and work again!! Don’t let that happen over any issue (EXCUSE!)

Failed Friendships, Fake Friendships!

(Failed Friendships!)

Suddenly,it was a question about me and my friendships! 

About the friendships that stopped existing 
About the friendships that were never meant to be but made me feel otherwise 

They say as you grow up, you start loosing friends but does this growth give you strength for accepting the loss?

What went wrong?

What changed?

Was it me?

Was it me who failed? 

Was it me whose efforts didn’t seem enough? 

Was it me who inspite of giving everything to them couldn’t take it far?

Too many failed friendships made me question myself!

And amidst the noises in my head my heart whispered they were never really your friends!

(Fake Friendships!)

And then I realised it was purely my destiny and fortune that bestowed me with only the best people in my life and kept removing the toxic ones so that one day all my efforts would be reciprocated and my friendships would last forever!